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Monday, April 19, 2010

April: The Guy Warning Signs List













Featured author Deb Caletti says, "Quinn's mother keeps a list of warning signs on her refrigerator (click here to see it). What would you add to the list? What would you take off of it?"




9 comments:

Melissa Walker said...

That list is so long! Quinn's mom has so many walls up! I'd take a lot off of this list...

Little Willow said...

My heart goes out to Deb, with admiration for her willingness to share something so personal.

Melissa Walker said...

Yes, it's such a work of love, this book! And it's important to note that everyone reads the list differently, based on their experiences. I've been lucky with good guys almost always, and I'm so grateful.

holly cupala said...

It's amazing that Deb has written this book from a place of such personal pain. I agree, a work of love!

I think some of the points on that list might be harmless by themselves, though collectively, they are very good warning signs that something is very wrong in a relationship (having been in a couple of those and finally realizing they were destructive and in some ways abusive!). It's very easy to lose perspective when you care about someone.

Thank you, Deb, for sharing that list.

Lorie Ann Grover said...

Wow! And it's sad I can think of a couple more immediately:

* He looks at other women in your presence.
* He tells you could be beautiful if you only...
* He takes you to events you are uncomfortable with and won't leave when you need to.

*shivers*

holly cupala said...

Those are really good, Lorie Ann! You gave me chills - I remember all three of those happening with a guy I only dated for a couple weeks before I recognized those alarm bells going off. Scary.

Deb said...

Thanks, guys! I stand by every item on the list, but for men and women both. Totally agree with yours, too, Loria Ann. :)

Deb said...

Oh, and... It might be helpful to know that "the list" came from extensive reading on the characteristics and traits of those with personality disorders, which contribute their fair share to dysfunctional/abusive relationships. Luckily, it was not all from my own experience! :) :) :) Thought it might be important to comment on where the list items originated.

Lorie Ann Grover said...

Yes, Deb! I thought they had all come from your past. Shew!