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Friday, August 21, 2009

August: Getting physical


Kendra has a physical relationship with Nashawn early on. Is this common among your friends or do things move more slowly? Which is best for you?


Melissa Walker said...

Ooh, this is personal! When I was dating in my teens/early 20s I think I moved kinda fast. Not first-date fast but definitely "within a month" fast. Okay, now someone else share so I don't feel like Ms. TMI.

Color Online said...

This is very common among the teens I work with. In my teens, among my friends it was mixed. I very much understood how Kendra felt and behaved.

I'm glad you're addressing this. Too often we emphasize not getting pregnant to girls but we fail to share with them how overwhelming the desire is, how confusing and how quickly things can progress. We fail to talk about the shame and guilt, the not being able to reconcile how our responsive our bodies can be while emotionally we are conflicted.

One of the most poignant, powerful scenes in the book is the first sexual encounter between Kendra and NeShawn. It is the best representation of the confusion and subsequent behavior I have ever read in a YA work. In fact, I have been thinking long and hard how to write about this at length in a review in the near future.

Lorie Ann Grover said...

Definitely let us know when you post your review, Color Online!

I'm married, but I know a lot of teens right now committed to moving s-l-o-w-l-y. In fact, I'm reading a book about it. Courting is a whole other world from what I grew up with. Even though that was slow in my circle in the 80s.

Seems to me this is unusual, however. Yes, Coe represents.

Dia Calhoun said...

Yes, I agree that the mind and emotions and body can all be in a state of warfare with each other. Who is ruling in that critical moment when you are faced with a choice such as Kendra was with Nashawn? To me, she didn't seem to even choose, she just went along with what someone else was doing to her as though swept away by a tsunami. This is why I think it is important to think through what you value and believe in advance, so when you are facing a difficult choice you can truly choose.

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